Eight days and counting!

Now, only eight days are left before I leave for India. There is excitement in the air.  A nervous energy that is hard to contain. I find my mind racing between all the things that need to be attended to before I leave and all the things I want to accomplish while I am in India. There will never be enough time to do all the things I want to do in India. There is always this wistful sense of staying for a long time. I try to wrap my mind around how to achieve that. And, come to the conclusion-- an extended stay is required. A few weeks ain't going to get the job done! 

Yet, an extended stay is not practical at this point in my life. 

Hindus do have a practical way of handling the golden years of a person's life. A person can take 'Sannyas'.  This means leaving your present life behind and going on a pilgrimage for the rest of your life. A person who takes sannyas is known as a sannyasi. I have always been fascinated by this idea. I remember being very young and being carried away by this concept. There is a sense of freedom in this notion. A person is still of this world but not in it. 

At this point, I am by no means in the golden years of my life. I am not even a grandmother yet. I think I have been ready to become a sannyasi for a very long time now. Even before I became a mother, even while I was a teenager. I was drawn to this lifestyle. I could not understand why I had to wait so long to take sannyas? As I get older, I feel like I am inching ever so close to becoming a Sannyasi, much to the chagrin of my children. I think this trip to India is bringing this desire to the surface again. 

I wonder, would it be possible for me to live in India for an extended period of time? Would I want to take Sannyas? As I write this, I am surprised that the thought of Sannyas came to my mind. I guess it has never left my thoughts, was just pushed way back while I tended to raising my family. 

Now, I am at a different place. Now I can muse over the possibilities that lie ahead for me. I wonder what else is going to bubble up to the surface during this upcoming trip?